Shastra’s Blog

SEXUAL SHAME ~ Sexual Frozenness ~

How is sexual shame preventing you from living an expressive and happy life? This is a big subject. And we all have it to some degree.

Do you sometimes feel frozen sexually?

Or do you judge yourself for being ‘Too Sexual’ ? Guilt can be a cause of this type of judgement.

Or are you not satisfied with how your sexual parts look?

These are all subjects to each explore separately. Our bodies contain so much wisdom to help us rise above some of these issues.

Sexual energy is NATURAL and if expressed w/o shame is SO POWERFUL, just think of the way you feel after an amazing sexual experience, PRETTY EXPANDED, I imagine, and do you feel limitless!!! Like you can accomplish anything!!! At least for a day or two.

There is a saying, that we orgasm when we can’t handle any more pleasure…..

This is where sexual shame comes in. It can be slight at first, we can make up excuses like, “well I have an appointment to get to, I had better stop for now.

Conscious Sex, tantric sex, is all about Going Slow & Noticing ….the deeper moment to moment feelings with in ourselves and our resistance to full mind blowing sex. You can even practice these awarenesses by your self.

Today I want to focus on sexual frozenness.

For women, our bodies can shut down after a negative sexual experience or relationship. It is really our minds and our amygdala, that has stored the trauma, that tells our body to contract. But our body actually can shed the trauma and rise above it and release the storage of it in the amygdala,. If we let it.

In the tantric path this is done thru many specific practices, including the breath, and specific self touch and other practices. We don’t have to stay stuck. We have more personal power than we think.

For men, the same thing can happen. You can lose your confidence after a negative experience or relationship. And shut down sexually and emotionally. Of course it can manifest into P.E. Or E.D. I always encourage men to go deeper. There is a great opportunity to admit that your sensitivities matter, and connect to what your real emotional needs are. Maybe you are not loving yourself enough to admit what you want in a relationship and in sex, And then Asking for it.

For these issues I find three things very helpful:

…Renew a relationship with your sex center, allow all emotions to be felt and be expressed and released

…Resensitize your genital area with a special tantric self pleasuring practice

…Start connecting your genital area with your heart

THERE ARE MANY TANTRIC PRACTICES YOU CAN DO TO ASSIST YOU.

WE WILL EXPLORE OTHER ASPECTS OF SEXUAL SHAME SOON.

I love you and am here for you.

 

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THE POWER OF OUR SEX DRIVE ~

Unconscious Sex Drive wants to act out to repress emotional pain.

Conscious Sex Drive wants to express passion & love. But the
heart can know if you are using your sex drive to repress deeper
negative feelings or to express love.

The PURE HEART is free from longing and holds compassion for another’s
repressed heart. It knows how to WAIT, for the sake of another. PURE
HEART has the ability to discern what kind of loving another wants, in
the moment.

Even the most hardened man, who has pushed away his longing for the
tenderness & love of a woman, in favor of his pursuit of money &
career, will eventually have to come full circle, knowing that by
abandoning his connection to the feminine, he is not whole and can
never reach full enlightenment. Sex Drive knows this, and serves as a
profound spiritual catalyst; pushing, pushing him to move forward
toward the feminine, even when his wounded heart & head says NO.

Even the most self sufficient woman, who has convinced herself that
risking another experience of hurt by opening and revealing herself,
even to her own partner, is not worth it; will realize eventually that
without the amazing gifts that the empowered masculine has to offer,
she can never really feel fulfilled. But her Sex Drive knows… and will
keep pushing her… until she can remain open..always… in her loving.

So tonight, take another step… to move into your natural roles…as the
masculine… to reach out…to the feminine…and admit your longing to be
close to her. And as the feminine…have the courage… just for one
night…to accept and surrender to your own vulnerability and receptive
nature… and admit to your masculine partner or essence… your longing…
to be taken over by male spiritual strength & passion.

So tonight, just RELAX… in the presence of love itself!

BLESSING YOUR PATH OF LOVE,

SHASTRA

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 SEX AND ASCENSION ~

I have a question for you!  Can you describe what happens to you and
what it feels like at the height of an orgasmic experience?

What is sexual energy in its purest essence, without thoughts about what it represented in the past, or what emotional ties to sex we have developed, or what dependence we may have on the sexual experience?

The mind does play an important role, biologically in creating a pleasurable sexual experience in that the activation of the pineal gland and pituitary greatly assist our sex center to relax and open.

What happens when we allow this indescribable, beautiful, sexual energy to flow through every cell of our body and allow it to activate all energy centers of the body, and all of our subtle bodies?

When we experience this level of pleasure…ordinary sex becomes….Hi Sex… Then we realize that this sensation IS THE ENERGY TO POTENTIATE OUR ASCENSION!

I ONCE MET A MAN NAMED Michael Monk, a man who has the ability to partially dematerialize his body. In studying with him and learning his ‘Mastery of Enlightenment’ program, I was pleasantly surprised to find that the very first exercise in the program, which he says is the most important…. is the very exercise that I offer in my Level Two, ‘Full Body Awakening’ Workshop!

I have had the personal experience of feeling as if my legs were going to dematerialize during one of the daily practice breath work exercises that I do.

I know that our bodies, not our minds alone, hold the key for expanded states. For me, if I forget to do my practice I can slip into ordinary human states, we all experience; confusion, worry, and compression.

Human beings have only one energy, and in its raw, unrefined state this is sex. Through the practice of Tantra, your sexual energy becomes refined, leading you on a path to spiritual awakening.

The intensity of sexual energy cannot be matched with any emotion known to humans. The force instigated by sexual energy can override even the most intense fears in a human; there is enough evidence to suggest that humans can undertake some extremely risky behaviors under the influence of this energy, which they would not dream of doing if they were not taken up by it. No other force has the power to inject the amount of courage, fearlessness, imagination, impetus, motivation and creativity that the force of sexual energy has. This is one reason why sex is the most sought after activity by humans and why sex is the major topic of discussion in all spiritual and religious literatures.

When you don’t expend sexual energy through a physical release, it seems to channel into creative actions automatically – getting things done which you might not have had the energy to do previously.

– The force of this sexual energy has the power to burn through resistances within you (that arise from fears or phobias in the mind) – it’s like being under the influence of a powerful drug while also being conscious in its wake.

Be authentic/honest within yourself to recognize if you are a prisoner to your sex drive or if you are stable enough in your being to be able to contain this sexual energy without it playing the master.

With Ecstatic Joy!

Shastra

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YOUR EMOTIONS ~ A Curse or A Gateway ~

In this modern age of technology sometimes even the idea of talking about emotions let alone expressing them seems to be taboo.
ARE YOU AFRAID OF YOUR EMOTIONS?I

WE ARE BECOMING MORE AND MORE REPRESSED ALL THE TIME.

BUT-

Transforming hurt emotions into Feelings of joy IS THE ABSOLUTE KEY TO EXPERIENCING THE HIGHEST SEX POSSIBLE.

HOW DOES  EMOTIONAL EXPRESSION PLAY AN IMPORTANT PART IN FULFILLING SEX?

We want to feel very free in our bodies

With this freedom comes amazing creative ideas,,, we can tap into our missions

Turning emotions into feelings of joy IS A GATEWAY TO OUR PERSONAL ASCENSION

& FULL BODY ORGASMS THAT LAST FOR DAYS!!!

GOT YOUR ATTENTION YET?

YOU CAN ONLY CONNECT WITH ANOTHERS EMOTIONS AND HELP THEM TURN INTO FEELINGS OF PASSION TO THE DEGREE THAT YOU CAN CONNECT WITH YOUR OWN.!!!

I recently had a breakthrough with a family member. His main complaint fo me has been that I am too emotional. My main complaint of him has been anger/sadness that he does not  ever hang in there with me long enough to understand the very depth of what I am trying to express.  He has just kept pushing me away.

THERE ARE ALL KINDS OF PEOPLE ON THE PLANET AND THEY ARE ALL MAGNIFICENT:

~~The Scientists with brilliant mental prowess

~~The comedians, so full of laughter

~~The Wise People

~~The Warriors

~~The Nurturers

~~The Sensual  Souls

You could say that each type is a perfect expression.

BUT—

In my opinion, the highest quality is compassion, and compassion is enhanced thru a decision to FEEEEL no matter what type you are.

DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR:

COMPLAINTS OF MEN~

  • Her emotions are too intense for me, I can’t handle them
  • Can’t we just solve this logically?
  • Her emotions make me feel powerless
  • I want to walk away.

COMPLAINTS/SELF JUDGMENTS  OF WOMEN ~

  • Why doesn’t he understand me?
  • I want him to come closer when I am emotional
  • I dislike myself for being TOO emotional
  • Or I don’t want to open up to anyone,, for fear  or really hurting others.

THE TRUTH IS~~~

We are all time bombs wanting to dramatically express all range of emotions.

WHY ARE WE HOLDING BACK?

For myself, being a deeply feeling person, I don’t know where I would be today if I hadn’t given myself permission to ‘Let it All Out’. I realize it may be easier for a woman due to cultural correctness.

FORTUNATELY, TANTRA SHOWS US THE WAY TO EMOTIONAL FREEDOM!

In Love and Ecstasy,

Shastra

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RECOVERY FROM SEX ADDICTION: Posted – Tony’s Story ~

 TONY’S STORY

 Tony had a 20 year history of sex addiction. From the age of 16, Tony had a major problem controlling his sexual urges.  As a result, Tony was thought of as TOO aggressive by most young women and he had difficulty sustaining any long term relationships.

The strong sexual urges had a hold on Tony. He preferred the excitement of going from one brief affair to another. (His dopamine levels fluctuated dramatically due to excessive lower chakra masturbation.)

Tony’s attitude was, “Women will just have to put up with me.” He was demanding of women as a cover up for the feelings of confusion & self hate that was always knawing at his core.

Sex addiction can be triggered by many factors but the result is most always sexual shame and very low self esteem.  Sexual shame can be the result of one or more significant events or an ongoing negative emotional environment, but the motivation to continue acting out is always the same, TO ANESTHESTIZE EMOTIONAL PAIN.

In Tony’s case, an on going environment of being under constant pressure from his Dad, to ‘BE A MAN’, and TO BE ‘GOOD ENOUGH’, created tremendous ongoing stress for Tony.  Tony’s father, a sex addict, was verbally abusive, threatening & demanding of both sons. And in addition was constantly threatening to leave the family. The impending abandonment itself was enough to motivate Tony’s addiction.

Tony needed an outlet for his stress. And his first sexual experience at age 16, provided an intensely pleasurable new avenue.

Once an addiction sets in, with a predictive pattern established, conventional treatment such as therapy alone, rarely yield life transforming results.

 A TANTRIC PERSPECTIVE:

“It has been my observation that with sex addiction, there is rarely a connection  between the sex center and the crown chakra, and in addition, with the crown chakra invariably closed,  it can be extremely difficult to shift out of the addiction. I have observed many people with sex addiction stay stuck in their addiction for literally decades, using behavior modification, and attempted abstinence alone.

An open crown chakra through specific tantric practices &  spiritual integration modalities that I recommend, can open a person to state of joy and connectedness with a higher power that a 12 step program alone cannot accomplish. In addition, it is imperative to identify the ONSET of the addiction and to shift the resulting trauma out of the body to see any lasting results.”

 TONY’S HEALING:

Through ‘The Sensual Spirit Tantric Healing Program’

 The 1st Step:

The 1st step in helping Tony, was to identify the original onset of the addiction; when the behavior first started. In Tony’s case, it was initiated by one of a series of incidents where Tony’s father emotionally belittled him in front of several female peers at age 15.

 Then, Shastra guided him through a series of two, ‘Deep Core Transformation / Tantric Breath Work’ sessions, to successfully release the trauma from the amygdala & hypothalmus.  

 The next step for Tony was two fold:

. First, to open the chakras, specifically the heart and crown, and create strong connections between all chakras, through tantric breath work sessions & active tantric breath meditations.

. At that point, Tony was clear enough, with enough trauma reduced, and enough consciousness about his issues, to work with a dakini; who did hands on work with Tony to shift and disperse the strong sexual energy and show Tony how to integrate breath to do this himself.

In this way, Tony developed the confidence that he needed  that he could actually have control over his sexual urges himself!

 The Final & Key Step:

Tony’s father’s oppressive and abusive control over Tony had left its mark. But after all of the previous work, there was still a missing piece. A split off part.  Tony’s father energetically pulled out of Tony, and used  Tony’s self esteem. This is VERY COMMON with  sexual addiction & other sexual abuse issues.

Shastra helped Tony identify the areas and incidents where soul loss may have occurred and  recommended  an experienced soul retrieval practitioner.

 As a result, Tony, after 20 years of a constant battle with himself and his loss of personal integrity, is fully recovered!

 NOTE:

Introducing any soul retrieval work too soon, before Tony could move into a place of feeling truly connected to a higher source, would not have been beneficial, and could have reversed itself.

Introducing the tantric breath work and sessions with the dakini, after identifying one or more core issues that initiated his behavior & then releasing them from crucial areas of the brain; freed Tony to connect with his higher self, and accept the Spiritual Integration work necessary for a full recovery!

 Shastra  has integrated these modalities in specific sequencing thru 20 years of study & 6 yrs.observing sex addiction in a therapeutic setting.

 (For more information or to schedule a session with Shastra you may contact her via  e mail her at goddess.shastra@gmail.com.)

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{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

Shastra June 22, 2018 at 6:55 pm

Thank you Shastra. Very insightful!